You exclaim, “I do!” You are thrilled to be asked by your bestie if you would like to be her maid-of-honor.
It takes a while for excitement to fade before you realize there is a lot of things to do.
Then you ask yourself, what do?
It is not easy to be a maid-of-honor. You will need to be a head cheerleader, have the organization skills of Marie Kondo, and be able to think creatively. You can also help put out fires if you are good at it.
We know you are up for it. She chose you for a reason. This guide is designed to give you the best possible send-off for your marriage. Although it may seem like everything is about her, we are here to help you!
1. Leader of the Babes
You are the bridesmaids’ leader. You don’t have to be uncomfortable or unfamiliar with leadership.
Your job is to keep the bridesmaids updated. It’s your responsibility to let the rest of the bridal party know if you and the bride have made a decision.
They will coordinate the bachelorette party, bridal shower and other events.
You will delegate tasks and work with others to make this a memorable, fun, and unforgettable night. You can also opt for something a little more relaxed, but still entertaining.
Keep your eyes on communication. It’s your responsibility to remind the team about the larger picture if things go wrong.
Your best friend may also have a matron-of-honor, in which case the responsibilities will be shared. You have someone to help you with some of the chores. This Bella Bridesmaids article explains matron of honor duties and how you can collaborate to make this the most memorable day.
2. Shop for Dresses
You can help her choose the right dress. After trying on so many options, make a day out of it.
Be honest with her as she takes on different looks. If she is open to suggestions, suggest a few that you think would look great on her.
You can also choose the dresses for your bridesmaids – which is great because it’s what you’ll wear.
3. Bachelorette Party & Bridal Shower
You know her well and know her sense for humor. You are familiar with her comfort level, and you may be tempted to push it a bit during the bachelorette party.
Modern MOH has many ideas for bachelorette parties. Here is an article. There are no right or wrong ways to celebrate these events. The main difference is that one of them is something your grandmother would love.
All of the planning and responsibility for this event is not on your shoulders. The rest of your bridesmaids are there to assist you.
Talk to them about the plan and the budget. Be sure everyone is on the same page about the budget and that they can all contribute to its financing.
4. Voice of Reason
Even in the best of times, wedding planning can be stressful. Be there for your guests if they need you. You can be a voice for calm and reason. Be there to help others if something goes wrong.
Help the bride to get back on track if she spirals. Remind her that she is marrying her best friend (in addition to you, of course). is perfect so there’s no other need.
You may feel a bit like a circus ringmaster on the day of.
Your job is ensure that everything runs smoothly. Do your best to not make the bride feel burdened if there is a problem. It’s easy to solve, and she won’t even notice.
6. Holder for Hands & Things
It can be difficult to slip into the wedding gown after your hair has been perfectly combed and your makeup done. Her mom might cry, or she may feel overwhelmed. Be there for her. Hold onto her hand and any other hands that she needs.
It can be overwhelming. It’s a lot. One minute you’re trying to hide a rip in your dress and the next, all that’s needed is your presence.
You will likely also have her bouquet as she stands up at the altar. You may also be able to hold her flute of champagne during the reception. If her gown has a long train, it may be necessary to keep it on your person until she escapes into the bathroom.
As you can see, maids of honor have many specialized skills. Do not be afraid to have fun and don’t let it get in your way. This is a celebration, happy moods are contagious.